Are you taking applications? ;-)

So you are saying I'd be in this woman's harem without emotional attachment between us? Is this voluntary? If so, I likely wouldn't be there. With emotional attachment -- yes I could do it given the right conditions. Those conditions would be what you'd expect for any well functioning poly relationship.

Hi Ally,

A couple of points/questions. Harem implies the guys wouldn't be able to maintain other relationships? Or would they?

How is this setup different than polyamory?

So, first the "without love" answer.

I'm in a poly relationship with a wonderful goddess type. She's married. Though we share huge love she has another for her heart. She also has another lover other than her husband. No worries about how it makes me feel, we're all having a blast. No worries accepting that she sees others. Lots of respect for how she handles herself and the situation.

With love:

As part of a poly relationship with my wife of 38 years, I certainly don't expect to meet every need hers. I certainly respect my wife even though she has sex with others. I totally accept that she sees others.

And they both respect and accept me and my lovers and don't expect they can meet all my needs.

Hugs,

Rig Daddy

sure, why not. As long as everyone agrees up front. I think this is fairly common in polyamory circles, it is also in our community.

and yes, there is sometimes jealousy.

not a guy, but I've got to tell you... it works well for me. All four of the guys I'm currently seeing know about the others. No drama, no pressure to be anything beyond what one naturally is, and all are friendship based meaning these are guys I've known for awhile (except one) and I trust. Each relationship is unique - each guy has different qualities that meet different needs of mine and I think it's important to point out that the converse is also very likely true since they all maintain other relationships as well.

The relationship structure is called polyandry and in the poly community it is not uncommon. Personally I would have no problem with it as long as I had the right to have other partners as well..

Personally I have no particular jealousy issues <or rather any that creep up I am completely able to discuss them. So it would be no problem.

JSin

Ok, this is an issue that has been bothering me for 30+ days. What is "emotional attachment"?

"Love does NOT meet sex.. How does it make you feel?"

Fine.

"Can you accept a woman being able to see others like another man?"

Um, duh. That's assumed, and usually expected, if they're a part of my harem in any capacity. If they decide to stay monamorous.. good too!

"If you couldn't could you still respect that her that she could do this?"

N/A.

~ Kole

I can and do accept it. No double standards here.

And I can absolutely separate love and sex.

HOWEVER, a coupe of times I have fallen in love with a lover, or she with me, and then it all went down hill from there. It's got to be mutual sex or mutual love.

Or in my case, looking for love and sex all in one package. Maybe two. ;-)