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Do you take the idea of "the Chase" as romantic?
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Hawaii
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Re: the "Chase/Hoops"
Wed, May 13, 2009 - 6:17 AMIt -can- be romantic, but I consider it part of the fun, particularly if you're both not taking it too seriously.
~ Kole -
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Re: the "Chase/Hoops"
Wed, May 13, 2009 - 6:21 PMNot taking it seriously is the key, as Kole said. When you chase, you run the risk of setting up an uneven power dynamic at the outset. Some people who need the chase to be in a relationship also feel the need to be catered to constantly in the relationship. I say, chase each other. That way, both people get the experience of being hunted, and the hunter. -
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Re: the "Chase/Hoops"
Wed, May 13, 2009 - 8:20 PM">Some people who need the chase to be in a relationship also feel the need to be catered to constantly in the relationship"
high-maintenance! many people think high-maintenance refers to the "material-girl" but it's really about not just money, but energy, attention and time. Yes, when the "chase" is discovered to be "attendance" one should step away from the "machine"
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Re: the "Chase/Hoops"
Tue, June 9, 2009 - 10:37 AMYep, I agree totally ....the chase has to be mutual, or I am not in. I will only chase as long as I am chased back to some degree. I have never been a believer in the whole "the man chases the woman, and the woman coyly evades the man" kinda thing. I agree it sets up an unbalanced approach to the relationship that can become a pattern. Not my thing.
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Re: the "Chase/Hoops"
Sun, June 7, 2009 - 10:31 AMFrom the female's point of view... or more specifically, the "prey's" point of view.... I love the chase. Makes me feel special and worth the pursuer's effort. When that is no longer present, it's harder to keep up the confirmation that the partner is every bit as desirable and worth the energy as when you first began the pursuit. -
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Re: the "Chase/Hoops"
Sun, June 7, 2009 - 1:08 PM>"Makes me feel special and worth the pursuer's effort. When that is no longer present, it's harder to keep up the confirmation that the partner is every bit as desirable and worth the energy as when you first began the pursuit."
????? HE makes you feel special and worth HIS EFFORT? Is that right? -
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Re: the "Chase/Hoops"
Fri, July 17, 2009 - 4:54 PMI love the chase. To me, the chase is an art. -
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Re: the "Chase/Hoops"
Fri, July 17, 2009 - 6:16 PMChase but don't run too fast.
I like romance, seduction, petting, playing, teasing, being intimate. -
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Re: the "Chase/Hoops"
Sat, July 18, 2009 - 3:41 AMi can sense the desperation in some girls who make it too easy to be caught. those are
usually the girls i avoid at all costs. being too available. make a brotha work for it! push
pull let me know you're interested without becoming to needy.
for the people who think it's all games. don't think of it as that, you want the guy who really
wants you. we appreciate it more since we had to work for it. -
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Re: the "Chase/Hoops"
Fri, July 24, 2009 - 1:02 PM>"we appreciate it more since we had to work for it. "
In some cases, "the chase" can be a very fun and even flattering pursuit. Yes, even an art. But the above quote makes me ask.......
Do you appreciate anything "more" because you were OVER-charged for it? Some people actually over-price their work on the assumption that it will be valued more by potential buyers. -
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Re: the "Chase/Hoops"
Fri, July 24, 2009 - 1:52 PMdefinitely an art,,,which can be summed up as
" the angle of the dangle equals the heat of the meat "
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Re: the "Chase/Hoops"
Sun, July 26, 2009 - 5:35 AMpoon...
to answer ? things that are handed to me i tend to not value as much. a quick joyride at best
the things i put my time and energy in and i get in the end tastes so much better. imo.
i'm an artist/musician and i take issue with your last statement. i'm worth every fucking penny that i charge for a piece of my work and a ticket for a show.
there is no monopoly around here. you either pay the toll or roll the hell on. no one is forces
anyone to pay outrageous prices for things. they choose to. for someone who's broke as
hell or cheap things seem over-priced. there is almost always a less expensive option
around. -
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Re: the "Chase/Hoops"
Sun, July 26, 2009 - 9:21 PMRyan - For the very reasons you give.....
The more I invest in anything, the more I expect it to outperform what requires less. Price/cost does not equal value.
You can tell yourself it is worth more because of the effort you spent , but that does not make it so. Just because something comes easy FOR SOME, does not decrease its intrinsic value. I expended no effort whatsoever to be born into this world, but my life is precious. I was not opposing the idea that one pays the cost or moves on. But when they start "scalping" I don't even consider it, on ethical grounds.
(I too am an artist/musician.... for over 40 years I am worth more than I charge. Always have been.... they can't pay me enough. I am compelled to do "it" for other reasons)
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